As we take care of our parents, we sometimes forget we too are aging.

Part of the aging process is to experience a sense of loss that is almost daily.

Those things that were most familiar and connect us to our pasts are often  lost in the fast changing scenes of the present.

Is it permissible to grieve?

Yesterday I experienced great loss, but it wasn’t for a loved one, which makes me feel all the more guilt.

I attended the last service of a congregation where my grandparents were active members, and where my mother was baptized and married. 

That once great church had dwindled down to just 45 members.  And those business savvy people had sold out to a big box retailer. (They will be  paid millions.)  But the money will be given to another congregation down the street with which they will merge.

Gone were all the members I remembered who were always there in their own pews.  I can still see them along with my grandfather with his cane. (He only had one leg.)  And my grandmother who always gloves. 

"I guess the balcony will hold up for one more service," the song leader announced. "It was built for 250 and we’ve got 300 up there."

That caused quick glances all around.  Thank goodness we weren’t sitting directly underneath it.   

Then there were the television cameras.  Seems the last church service in an 85- year -old  building makes the 10 PM news. At least it does in the buckle of the Bible belt.

But I ran into my cousin who had driven 100 miles to be there.  Sometime next summer she’ll become the first in our generation to be a grandparent.   One generation passes and another quickly takes its place.  It all happens in real time.  

But I’m reminded almost two generations have passed since we ran through the heavy doors for Vacation Bible Schools on hot summer days. Could that  have really been over 40 years ago?

So even though I’m grieving there’s solace that I’m not alone.  And that’s my point.  We may think we’re alone, but we really aren’t. There were over 750 people at the service yesterday.   

I’m not sure if losing gets any easier as we grow  older, but at least the process gives us the grace to be thankful for each day we have with our aging parents.  Our time with them will be short enough.   

Popularity: 1% [?]

Be Sociable, Share!

•