We can all remember a time when we took the children to some event or theme park that was supposed to be totally awesome. Then when the kids get there and see that Mickey Mouse is a guy in a suit and therefore the rides are about the same as the local Six Flags, a unavoidable let down and disenchantment sets in. And that is not fun for the parents on the trip home when all of those expectations did not come to pass when the kids came face to face with fact which did not line up with their dreams and hopes.
But infrequently even adults can be guilty of letting dreams and images of a golden time ahead get the best of us. We often develop a mythology of how retirement will be when we get there and when that retired life essentially starts, there are some real, level-headed adjustments that have to be made. So if you can know some of the concealed downsides of retirement in advance, it’s so much better to go into retirement with your eyes open and have realistic expectancies.
There are 2 negative reactions to the unexpected shift of lifestyle in retirement. They are isolation and boredom. Even if you are going to be home all the time, there isn’t any question that after you stop going to an office or having regular responsibilities, you can frequently feel a feeling of loss and grief as you miss the people, the regular human contact and the excitement of being out and that can lead to isolation that can get pretty protracted.
For men particularly the sensation of tedium can also set in pretty fast when the issue of the work world goes away. In lots of cases, men live for their jobs and when that world goes away, there’s a sense of disorientation and not knowing what to do with themselves that’s disconcerting for the family and for the retired man himself. You could have been looking forward to a less stressful life to find that this was the strain that makes you tick and without it, you’re feeling adrift in life with no direction or goals.
Both these Problems can be addressed by not letting your retirement life be to idle, at least not at first. You can fill your life up with volunteering, getting busy with family or by getting involved socially with other retired folk. One area of volunteering that will go a long way to replace the gratification of the work place is to work with habitat for humanity to help build homes for folk who can’t afford a home any other way. Both retired married partners can find ways to pitch in and it will get you out with folk doing things that are rewarding.
Give yourself time to get used to the concept of retirement and to the new lifestyle . It should be a simpler way of life because your duties are reduced and you’ve more time on your hands. Be aware that if you and your partner are suddenly around one another every day and every hour of the day, that is going to form new strains which can also qualify as a hidden danger of retirement. By being aware that this isn’t due to either spouse but a natural reaction. The best response is simply to get out and do things separately and create that natural space you are both used to more frequently.
There’ll be a natural down time when you first retire and treat the first month like holiday. But do not stay on vacation. Let your ambition and fervour for life find new outlets. It’ll be thrilling and fun to see where it takes you and that’s what retirement is all about.